If anyone tells you adoption is an easy road, I would freely call them a fabricator. Even me who tries to always see the positive in things sometimes gets halted in my tracks.
The rush to get things done then the waiting for court dates, travel dates, submission dates, the mountains of paperwork, the enormous amounts of money, the stress, the questions.
I sit here today and wait for news on whether we will be submitted to court tomorrow. I see all our plans for our final, huge fundraiser golf tournament and dinner/silent auction this Saturday. We lack about $7500 to be fully funded.
I see the chance of rain being pushed from the middle of the week to closer to the weekend when we have our golf tournament scheduled. I see friends that were coming to our dinner now have other plans and have canceled their rsvp. I see other friends that think we are completely nuts (who deserted us after we had Alayna or have dwindled along the road in the past 2 years). I see an rsvp list for our dinner much smaller than those who "said" they were coming.
My heart is saddened, I could continue to look at the negative but, if you have known me long you know I choose otherwise.
I choose to rely on God, I choose to have faith that He DID call us to adopt Dariya and that he will provide the way. The negatives are from satan and I will not let him have any power over me.
So instead, I see God's hand completely guiding this adoption. I choose to see awesome people who have volunteered, met, planned and are carrying out this fundraiser seamlessly. I see many people (some I have never met) coming to serve at our dinner for our daughter and I am humbled.
I see nearly 50 silent auction items that have been donated because of the awesome work our team has done on the graphics (Heather you are amazing) and talking to businesses Kelly (you are unstoppable). I see 36 golfers who are going to hang out with us on Saturday afternoon not just to enjoy a round of golf but, to help us bring our daughter home.
I see musicians who are giving their time and talent to come and entertain during the dinner, I see people give deep not out of need for thank you from us but, out of their sheer love for us and desire to be the hands of Christ on our mission.
I see am amazing community of Christ followers via Reece's Rainbow and have made friends that will last a lifetime.
I see this face and I know with all my heart that I am her momma. I WILL obey God's call for our lives with a joyful heart.